My husband is very sensitive and I'm worried he might develop feelings for her. He's given me access to all his devices and private information to reassure me of his loyalty.
I'm really struggling right now! I'm at the stage where I feel like I'm losing my mind. I have no clue how to deal with this. Please excuse me for the poor write up, I wrote this in while ill.
I met my husband, a single father of 3 children, while I was also a single mother of 2 kids. We crossed paths 3 years after his divorce from his ex, during my third year of being divorced. I inquired about the reason behind his ex-wife ending their marriage, and he revealed that she cheated on him with a well-known artist right after a meet and greet he had paid for.
He confessed that he only found out about it when she disappeared on him after he excused himself for a bathroom break. After searching for her for hours, he went on to explain that, following days of demanding an explanation for her infidelity, she informed him that he wasn't satisfying her in bed, she was bored, and she took the opportunity to explore and fulfill her fantasies.
He told me he first met his ex-wife when he was still a virgin, and she was the one who took his virginity. I was skeptical at first, but after doing some digging, I decided to give him a chance. I have to admit, he has been nothing short of amazing since we got together. After many months together, I taught him everything to knows about sex, and now he's a pro.
Ever since we relocated to Florida two years ago, my husband's ex has been causing us trouble. She used to bother us when we were in New York, but the distance made it easier to ignore her. Unfortunately, moving down south before the pandemic made it more affordable for her to move closer to us from Wyoming.
In our home, I manage all the finances while he instructs me on providing her monthly allowances and child support. I've been doing this, but she's still not happy. She calls at strange times, saying how much she misses him. My husband is very sensitive and I'm worried he might develop feelings for her. He's given me access to all his devices and private information to reassure me of his loyalty. I've blocked her numbers, deleted her inappropriate photos, informed our friends and family, and even asked my husband to get a restraining order, but he refused, saying he doesn't want anything to affect his relationship with his kids. Despite this, she kept using her children to manipulate us.
A month back, she contacted us about her oldest son being really ill, my husband insisted we go since the boy wasn't picking up his phone (he's 16). When we arrived, she hurried over to my husband and kissed him on the cheek. My husband asked me to stay calm and warned her firmly. Then she looked me in the eye and boldly claimed we are both his wives and I can't do anything about it.
A few days back, she messaged my husband, trying to seduce him into having sex with her so she could have another child. She mentioned she already has three sons and now wants a daughter. I was furious when I read the message. My husband didn't respond, he simply showed it to me and told me to reply to her.
Until now, I still feel frustrated, I refuse to lose my family. My former spouse has started a new family (he left me and our two young kids for his business partner) and I haven't tried to ask for anything. My current husband looks after my children, raising them as if they were his own, a blessing I never expected to receive.
I hate to come off as selfish, but I feel like I need to lay down the law with my husband. It's either we go back to New York and pick up where we left off, or our marriage is done. What's your take on this?
THANK YOU FOR YOUR TIME
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